Finding a way out
by Just a random band geek
Summary: Nepeta Leijon cannot do it anymore. While dealing with the death of her father, her longtime crush, Karkat, gets together with a girl named Terezi, leaving the catlike girl heartbroken. Unable to deal with the pain ay longer, she turns to alternative methods of coping... AUs:Humanstuck, sadstuck TW: suicide, hanging, death Rated M for the above said themes


Nepeta glanced across the lunch table at the two of them holding hands, and occasionally sneaking kisses. She tried to hide the hurt and sorrow in her eyes as she watched her longtime crush, Karkat, hanging with his new girlfriend Terezi.

The Leo stood up and threw her trash away, her absence unnoticed by the new couple. She couldn't stand it anymore. She needed to leave; needed to get away from them and the sadness and jealousy that overwhelmed her every time she looked at them,

Nobody could stop her. Ever since her father had died, she was never the same. And now this. To make matters worse, her mom was going to make them move back to Sweden. To _Sweden_. In her move to the States, she already had to leave a lot of her friends, but at least she had met Equius...

Nepeta's heart beat faster from the exhilaration of sneaking out as she walked out of the school. Equius was like a brother to her. He watched out for her, she watched out for him. But he wouldn't watch out for her now. He was out of town. The baseball team, which he was a part of, had made it to Nationals, and he was off playing baseball against some random team in some random state.

The catlike girl walked over to the bus stop and fished out a dollar and some quarters. People might be suspicious about a student riding home all on her own, but it wouldn't be too bad. Her mom wouldn't ask questions, she knew, but rather bury herself in memories of when her husband was alive. Her sister, Meulin, would probably be hanging out with her boyfriend and his friends, and not be home until dinner or maybe even later. That would leave her alone with plenty of time, which she normally used for various things such as doing homework. Not today though.

Nepeta was pulled out of her musings by the screech of brakes as the bus pulled to a stop in front of her. She gave the bus driver the money and quickly sat in a seat near the middle of the bus, drawing her long green coat, a present from Equius, around her and hiding her face in her hat.

After a while of staring out the window and tapping her fingers impatiently on her leg, she saw the familiar trees signaling the bus stop near her neighborhood and pulled the bright yellow cord near her head. The bus groaned to a stop and Nepeta hopped off, waving to the bus driver and walking slowly to her house, tears streaming down her face. Why did it have to be like this. Why.

She opened the door to her house and stepped inside, closing it and knocking it behind her. Her cat, Pounce, was curled up on the sofa, taking a nap. he graceful cat looked up as she walked in, then went back to its nap. Nepeta allowed herself a small smile and walked upstairs, her vision blurred with tears.

Eventually, she reached the living room and set down the rope, grabbing the pen and paper and beginning to write.

 _Dear Everyone,_

 _I'm sorry to go so soon, but I just can't do it anymore._

 _Now I'll no longer be a waste of space_

 _A fifth wheel_

 _Its for the best_

 _-Nepeta Leijon :33_

 _PS: Equius I'm sorry for leaving you like this, but you'll get over it eventually. Best of luck with Aradia!_

She cringed internally at the simplistic nature of her note, but looped the rope around the top of the ceiling fan and fashioned a noose. She made sure that it was high enough that her feet wouldn't touch the ground when she hung...

But first, she had something to do. She walked into the garage and grabbed a small container, which she knew contained arsenic rat poison. She shook out some of the poison, grabbed a carton of milk from the fridge, and poured herself a glass off milk. Then, she put some of the pebbles of the poisonous substance in her mouth and quickly washed it down with the milk. Even though she was going to end her life in other ways, she wanted to make sure that there was no chance she could be saved. She didn't _want_ to be saved

Nepeta grabbed a ladder and climbed up, slipping the noose over her head and looping it on her neck. Then, she closed her eyes, whispered "Goodbye" and jumped, knocking over the ladder and hanging, suspended, by the rope.

 ** _A/n:_ _If you are considering suicide right now, please talk to someone. Do not kill yourself, please. Too many people care about you._**

 ** _T_** _his is my first story, so feedback would be much appreciated  
_

 _Dan out_

 ** _End A/n_**


End file.
